The third party in your marriage

Is social media becoming the third party in your relationship?

Excessive usage of social media can have detrimental effects on a marriage, leading to conflicts and strained relationships. When partners spend too much time scrolling through social media platforms, they become distracted and fail to prioritize quality time together. This lack of attention can create tension and disagreements within the relationship.

In 2014, Paw Research Center found out that 25% of their study respondents confessed about realizing how their partners often get distracted by cellphones when they are spending time together. 8% of them also have conflicts regarding time spent on social media, and 4% had felt angry because of his/her partner's behavior on social media.

Did you know that Instagram was the social medium that has the worst effect on mental health in 2017? A Britain-based survey, which asked 1,500 respondents aged 18-24 years old, published that Instagram contributed the most on self-negative effects, such as anxiety, depression, FOMO (fear of missing out) and bullying.

A study published in Computers in Human Behavior found a link between social media use and decreased marriage quality in every model analyzed. The study results predict that people who do not use social media are 11 percent happier in their marriages than people that regularly use social media.

Sadly, according to a survey from Austin's Center of Population Research at University of Texas which observed couples aged 18 - 39 years old, a high usage of social media did not only trigger unhappy marriage, but also troubled relationship to thoughts of having a divorce.

Another issue that arises from social media usage is

jealousy. High usage of platforms like Facebook can trigger feelings of jealousy and insecurity within a relationship. Stalking behaviors on social media can lead to stress and uncertainty, further straining the bond between partners.

Furthermore, social media platforms can provide opportunities for unfaithfulness. Facebook and Instagram, in particular, have been known to facilitate connections and interactions that can lead to adultery, ultimately resulting in divorces. Twitter, too, has been linked to marriage conflicts and separations.

It is worth noting that couples who have been married for less than three years are particularly vulnerable to the negative influences of social media. However, regardless of the length of the relationship, maintaining open and effective communication is crucial in building a strong foundation that can withstand the allure of social media.

While social media can have its benefits, it is important to be mindful of its potential negative impact on a marriage. Here are five essential tips to ensure that social media doesn’t harm your marriage.

Set boundaries

- Agree on what is and isn’t okay to share about each other and your relationship

- Discuss communication and friend interactions, including how to handle reaching out from exes

Water your own grass

- Avoid comparing your life to others' highlight reels on social media

- Focus on nurturing your own marriage and addressing real issues

Don’t let it replace quality time

- Set aside dedicated device-free time to connect with your spouse

- Avoid mindlessly browsing social media and prioritize quality time together

Take a digital detox

- Consider taking periodic breaks from social media to refresh

- Unfollow accounts that don't serve you and your marriage in a positive way

Don’t just do it for the ‘gram

- Be present in the moment instead of focusing on capturing the perfect social media post

- Limit phone usage and enjoy real-time experiences with your spouse

Be mindful and intentional

- Ensure social media has a positive impact on your marriage

- Choose to focus on useful and positive aspects, while avoiding negative influences